Missing in Action...

 

I wish I could say that I have been so busy with excitement and fun, but that would be a lie. I’ve been pouting for the last week. A little case of PLOM’s disease ~ “Poor little old me” disease! 

I’m pouting because I DO NOT want to go back to work in 2 weeks. I actually don’t really want to go back at all, but that is NOT an option. I know this is ridiculous to even complain about, but it really is affecting me in a terrible way.

I LOVE staying home with Tinsae.

I LOVE being home all day to pick up the house, do the laundry, put things away, and clean up things that seem to always be there for a rainy day to-do list.

I LOVE being able to bring forgotten things to school for the older kids.

I LOVE picking the kids up from school as needed.

I LOVE being home when the 4 older kiddos come home from school.

I LOVE having the time to listen to EACH one of them tell me about their day.

I LOVE having the energy to review homework, listen to someone read a story to me, or pretend I know how to help solve their problems.

I LOVE making dinner for everyone and not being a frozen pizza! 

I LOVE having the energy at night to go to sporting events, band concerts, awards shows, church meetings, or take a sick child to the doctor. 

I LOVE having time to snuggle with Tinsae every night in my bed and watch him fall asleep.

I LOVE being a stay-at-home Mom!

But, I have to report back to work on Monday, December 19^th. And I don’t want to go. I feel like such a putz, complaining about this. I mean, I should be happy that I have a job. It's a pretty good job too. I like what I do and I like my co-workers! I don't mind the unending paperwork that I have to do and I like finding new things to teach my students.

I guess the thing that is really making me stress about going back to work, is the new administration. We have a NEW district administrator, a NEW elementary school principal, and a NEW director of special education. And, we also have NEW rules and expectations with the passing of Governor Walker's laws. 

I wish I could just go in, do my job and go home. But it is not that easy. Everything I do is always being watched, critiqued and often changed. I'm all for CHANGE, but this year, it is just overwhelming! 

So, for the past week, I have been sulking. I tried to do some Christmas shopping, but I didn't get much done. I've tried to decorate the house, but that is only half-done too. I've been trying to spend a LOT of time with Tinsae, which is easy to do, but he has also been pushing the limits around here. With everyone! He's actually been kind of sassy with the kids, not listening to rules, and outright stubborn! Pretty much, a typical 4-year old but with a little more intent! 

Don't get me wrong. He still is the most adorable little boy, that puts a smile on my face everyday! He's just so darn cute and he knows it. He loves to tease everyone. But when the teasing is put back on him, he runs for his mommy!

So, I will be putting on my "big girl undies" and starting to prepare for my return to work. I will work for 5 days and then have a week off for Christmas vacation. Tinsae will be going to an awesome babysitter only a few blocks from my school. Perfect!

So, this is my post that I am going to turn things around and QUIT POUTING! I can do this. For me and for my family! I love where I am at with attachment and bonding with Tinsae and can only pray that it continues after I go back to work.

And if you have time, please pray for me and the family for this transition. It's going to be rough at times, but I know we can make it through to our "new normal"!

Here are a few pics of my cute boys: